Hello and welcome ladies. Whether you’re a part time vaper, seasoned veteran, or you’ve decided to switch from disposable vapes to a refillable vape, we’ve put you all in different categories broken down by your go to flavour. You’ll see we’re weirdly good at identifying personalities based on peoples choice of flavour. Enjoy.
Pink Lemonade
You are the fiat 500 girly of your friendship group, you also happen to drive one. Your dad keeps threatening to take the keys off of you because you crashed into a Starbucks drive through twice in one day. You love sunbeds, Russian lashes, Zara and you are a true girls girl. Whenever your car starts making strange noises, you turn up your music and ignore it. Yesterday on TikTok, you learnt what the Mariana trench is and you spent an hour on google trying to find out how it was dug. You’re 5 foot 4 and you love talking to people about how tiny you are. You always hug the bouncers on the way into your local because they’ve known you since you were 16 and used to let you in anyway.
Sakura Grape
You’re on your 5th consecutive gap year currently backpacking in Barcelona, which you pronounce ‘Barthelonah’ because you think it makes you sound native (it doesn’t). You think you’re edgy because you have a cat called Quinoa and you wear a shell anklet, but you’re about as edgy as a satsuma. You say ‘I’m not like the other girls’ unironically and only have guy friends. Your therapist had to start getting therapy and you haven’t worn deodorant in 3 years. Next stop, Bali.
Orange Gummy Bear
You once had to get cut out of a toddlers swing seat in your local park by 4 firemen and ended up on the news. You baby talk with your boyfriend in public and have absolutely zero self awareness. You own a pair of heelies and you’ve always got slightly sticky hands. You ask people you barely know really personal questions because you’ve never mastered small talk.You’re basically a child, but you’re 28 and quite frankly need to grow up.
Blueberry
The first bill you pay when payday hits is your TV license, and you eat a Mr whippy from the bottom up. Your first language was Latin and you always put the milk in first . Nothing you do makes sense, you are the most random person anyone’s ever met and you make everyone feel on edge. If Captain Raymond Holt and Kanye West had a baby, that would be you.
Lemon and Lime
You enjoy going to the dentists, and you keep your Christmas tree up until March. The only spice in your life is the occasional bag of walkers max paprika you have as a treat, and you feel like you’re going to pass out if you have more than one cup of coffee. You’re the human embodiment of vanilla and when asked ‘what did you get up to this weekend’ you have to lie, because you know putting air in your tyres doesn’t count as weekend plans. A strong breeze could knock you clean out.
Cherry Ice
You are smart, sophisticated, intelligent, and always dressed the part because ‘you never know who you’re going to meet’. You have your bills organised in excel and you know exactly which bins needs to go out on what day. You also have daddy issues, and have trashed the car of every ex that’s broken up with you. Unfortunately for them, you have a new boyfriend every other month because you’re not hard to get, just hard to endure. You’ve got an extensive criminal record and you’re banned from entering 3 countries; you’re absolutely unhinged but no one really notices because you look like you mean business.
Marybull Ice
You’re a serial Facebook user. You like to comment on news articles as if you were speaking directly to the people being reported on. Last night you saw an article about Rihanna and you commented ‘Love the outfit x’. You used to dominate Facebook gaming and now Facebook dating. You browse on multiple devices at the same time and you regularly fall for scams; you’re down £500 this month so far. You like to comment ‘back in my day this wouldn’t have been allowed’ on every post you can. You’re only 31 but your online friends are all retired so you do it to fit in. In 2010 you picked up a cat and dumped it into a wheelie bin, you got caught on camera but no one ever figured out it was you.
Cola
You have a flip phone case and the only type of trousers you own are capris which you wear with Primark plimsoles. Your most used swear words are ‘Darn it’, ‘Frick’, and ‘Jesus Christmas’ and you strongly believe that the world ended in 2012. You’re absolutely harmless but you’re also a flat earther and you don’t believe in gravity. You love reading peoples star signs and walking them through their top traits.
Maryjack Kisses
Ew. You’re always the last one to be invited to plans with your friends. You take your shoes and socks off on commercial flights. You hate small children, puppies, love and Sunday roasts. When you’re in a queue you stand with your heels together and your toes pointing outwards and you regularly run for the bus, which you struggle with because it’s really hard to run with a bum bag. You’re a lover of Marmite (obviously) and your favourite thing to add to the end of a sentence is :3
Pineapple Ice
You scoot around at work on an office chair unironically and you listen to the same playlist you’ve had since you were 18. You’re at the pub half an hour after you leave work every Friday and you never know when to call it a night; you’re always skulking around a dodgy club completely off your face at 4am. Saturdays are for some light reading, you tell everyone your favourite book is War And Peace to make yourself sound interesting, when in fact you only read a brief synopsis of the TV adaptation. Your favourite book is actually the Gruffalo and you really enjoy a pint of milk before bed. You’d still get tucked in by your mum each night if you hadn’t of moved out.
In Summary
Well there we have it girlies, your whole personality summed up into one little flavoured box of air. Don’t take it too personally, we love you all really.
May 2024 be the year you don’t pay for a single set of lashes yourself.
What your vape says about you (girl edition)
Hello and welcome ladies. Whether you’re a part time vaper, seasoned veteran, or you’ve decided to switch from disposable vapes to a refillable vape, we’ve put you all in different categories broken down by your go to flavour. You’ll see we’re weirdly good at identifying personalities based on peoples choice of flavour. Enjoy.
Pink Lemonade
You are the fiat 500 girly of your friendship group, you also happen to drive one. Your dad keeps threatening to take the keys off of you because you crashed into a Starbucks drive through twice in one day. You love sunbeds, Russian lashes, Zara and you are a true girls girl. Whenever your car starts making strange noises, you turn up your music and ignore it. Yesterday on TikTok, you learnt what the Mariana trench is and you spent an hour on google trying to find out how it was dug. You’re 5 foot 4 and you love talking to people about how tiny you are. You always hug the bouncers on the way into your local because they’ve known you since you were 16 and used to let you in anyway.
Sakura Grape
You’re on your 5th consecutive gap year currently backpacking in Barcelona, which you pronounce ‘Barthelonah’ because you think it makes you sound native (it doesn’t). You think you’re edgy because you have a cat called Quinoa and you wear a shell anklet, but you’re about as edgy as a satsuma. You say ‘I’m not like the other girls’ unironically and only have guy friends. Your therapist had to start getting therapy and you haven’t worn deodorant in 3 years. Next stop, Bali.
Orange Gummy Bear
You once had to get cut out of a toddlers swing seat in your local park by 4 firemen and ended up on the news. You baby talk with your boyfriend in public and have absolutely zero self awareness. You own a pair of heelies and you’ve always got slightly sticky hands. You ask people you barely know really personal questions because you’ve never mastered small talk.You’re basically a child, but you’re 28 and quite frankly need to grow up.
Blueberry
The first bill you pay when payday hits is your TV license, and you eat a Mr whippy from the bottom up. Your first language was Latin and you always put the milk in first . Nothing you do makes sense, you are the most random person anyone’s ever met and you make everyone feel on edge. If Captain Raymond Holt and Kanye West had a baby, that would be you.
Lemon and Lime
You enjoy going to the dentists, and you keep your Christmas tree up until March. The only spice in your life is the occasional bag of walkers max paprika you have as a treat, and you feel like you’re going to pass out if you have more than one cup of coffee. You’re the human embodiment of vanilla and when asked ‘what did you get up to this weekend’ you have to lie, because you know putting air in your tyres doesn’t count as weekend plans. A strong breeze could knock you clean out.
Cherry Ice
You are smart, sophisticated, intelligent, and always dressed the part because ‘you never know who you’re going to meet’. You have your bills organised in excel and you know exactly which bins needs to go out on what day. You also have daddy issues, and have trashed the car of every ex that’s broken up with you. Unfortunately for them, you have a new boyfriend every other month because you’re not hard to get, just hard to endure. You’ve got an extensive criminal record and you’re banned from entering 3 countries; you’re absolutely unhinged but no one really notices because you look like you mean business.
Marybull Ice
You’re a serial Facebook user. You like to comment on news articles as if you were speaking directly to the people being reported on. Last night you saw an article about Rihanna and you commented ‘Love the outfit x’. You used to dominate Facebook gaming and now Facebook dating. You browse on multiple devices at the same time and you regularly fall for scams; you’re down £500 this month so far. You like to comment ‘back in my day this wouldn’t have been allowed’ on every post you can. You’re only 31 but your online friends are all retired so you do it to fit in. In 2010 you picked up a cat and dumped it into a wheelie bin, you got caught on camera but no one ever figured out it was you.
Cola
You have a flip phone case and the only type of trousers you own are capris which you wear with Primark plimsoles. Your most used swear words are ‘Darn it’, ‘Frick’, and ‘Jesus Christmas’ and you strongly believe that the world ended in 2012. You’re absolutely harmless but you’re also a flat earther and you don’t believe in gravity. You love reading peoples star signs and walking them through their top traits.
Maryjack Kisses
Ew. You’re always the last one to be invited to plans with your friends. You take your shoes and socks off on commercial flights. You hate small children, puppies, love and Sunday roasts. When you’re in a queue you stand with your heels together and your toes pointing outwards and you regularly run for the bus, which you struggle with because it’s really hard to run with a bum bag. You’re a lover of Marmite (obviously) and your favourite thing to add to the end of a sentence is :3
Pineapple Ice
You scoot around at work on an office chair unironically and you listen to the same playlist you’ve had since you were 18. You’re at the pub half an hour after you leave work every Friday and you never know when to call it a night; you’re always skulking around a dodgy club completely off your face at 4am. Saturdays are for some light reading, you tell everyone your favourite book is War And Peace to make yourself sound interesting, when in fact you only read a brief synopsis of the TV adaptation. Your favourite book is actually the Gruffalo and you really enjoy a pint of milk before bed. You’d still get tucked in by your mum each night if you hadn’t of moved out.
In Summary
Well there we have it girlies, your whole personality summed up into one little flavoured box of air. Don’t take it too personally, we love you all really.
May 2024 be the year you don’t pay for a single set of lashes yourself.